Starry moonlit sky
As the holy waters go by
Thoughts of mind
Body of an aural kind
And you, my only way
To know what is true; and what seems astray
Jading my unconsciousness are you,
Totemic, earth-believer
Listen: 'Sacred Science' from the collaboration of Karsh Kale, Baiju and Harigovindan.
Wednesday, December 14, 2011
Friday, October 28, 2011
How I stopped getting kissed, getting wild and still got a life
Linearity is a lot of fun afterall :)
The last two months have been about prioritizing incessantly and cutting out the variables in my course of existence. Also i tried very hard to feel fully and let all the craziness take over life. Yes, its been bad. A lot of psychological trouble manifests physically i've noticed. But its all good in the end. This experiment has yielded wonderful results although I still remain in search and yearning for all my loving.
I love sabbaticals, this holiday has reinforced that is new way of life seems to work pretty well for me. Somebody once told me that the most boring way to live was to be bouncing along safely in the middle of the apparent crests and troughs. Most of which I used to think are mental make-ups. There's a lot of drama to live and I love it. Besides, now I feel like an Architect, the internship helped clear a lot of dread about wanting to admit that I am an Architect, there I said it. Phew.
I am also a Teacher, I miss my kids at Make a Difference. I'm trying my very best to help them explore all the ways that they can learn best. So far, its been really good. Children are imperceptibly passive learners and to understand that is the greatest joy because no matter what we do in class; they are taken something back each time even if it is the tiniest thing.
Meanwhile, I've found some beautiful new music and literature too.
Zeb and Haniya are Pakistani artists who make soft rock-blues-jazz-alternative-ish music. The vocals are simply inspiring.
Listen: Aitebaar from their album Chup
Happy Diwali :)
The last two months have been about prioritizing incessantly and cutting out the variables in my course of existence. Also i tried very hard to feel fully and let all the craziness take over life. Yes, its been bad. A lot of psychological trouble manifests physically i've noticed. But its all good in the end. This experiment has yielded wonderful results although I still remain in search and yearning for all my loving.
I love sabbaticals, this holiday has reinforced that is new way of life seems to work pretty well for me. Somebody once told me that the most boring way to live was to be bouncing along safely in the middle of the apparent crests and troughs. Most of which I used to think are mental make-ups. There's a lot of drama to live and I love it. Besides, now I feel like an Architect, the internship helped clear a lot of dread about wanting to admit that I am an Architect, there I said it. Phew.
I am also a Teacher, I miss my kids at Make a Difference. I'm trying my very best to help them explore all the ways that they can learn best. So far, its been really good. Children are imperceptibly passive learners and to understand that is the greatest joy because no matter what we do in class; they are taken something back each time even if it is the tiniest thing.
Meanwhile, I've found some beautiful new music and literature too.
Zeb and Haniya are Pakistani artists who make soft rock-blues-jazz-alternative-ish music. The vocals are simply inspiring.
Listen: Aitebaar from their album Chup
Happy Diwali :)
Sunday, September 11, 2011
Juvenile delinquent
Stupid silly
Silly ridiculous
Ridiculous shame
Shame hurt
Hurt pain
Pain anger
Anger disappointment
Disappointment expectation
Expectation unlawful
Unlawful bastard
Bastard love
Love stupid
Stupid silly
PS: Victoria by John Mayer
Happy Ganpati
Silly ridiculous
Ridiculous shame
Shame hurt
Hurt pain
Pain anger
Anger disappointment
Disappointment expectation
Expectation unlawful
Unlawful bastard
Bastard love
Love stupid
Stupid silly
PS: Victoria by John Mayer
Happy Ganpati
Monday, August 29, 2011
Lesser Gods
To all the loving, needing, wanting, winning, losing, missing, yearning in the world. More than those who have been...and stayed....and gone. A projection of all the love gained and lost.
Flower Boy
He who smells of rain. Spells of an evergreen forest
A winter bloom. Race of uneven flesh
Powers of the collective of known. Upholder of belonging
Incantations. Holy verses bathed in pleasure
Pain of wanting, untarnished. Intensity of inescapability
Ungiving, forgiving, denying. Cobwebs of familiarity
Sweet, sweet smelling agony.
Stranger
Betrayer, son of the night.
Further than far.
Eyes of a cold faraway fire.
Perfect imperfection of hands.
Spine of fetal, feline recoil.
Conflict in the depth of silence.
Lover of the mirror.
Hands;Body;Mind;Heart-Soul?
Piece of Moon
Man of a whole universe.
Glib. Incorrect. Endearing.
Mind of the skies.
Home of his embrace.
Uncovered, blind faith.
Beautifully complete.
Sparkle
Formwave of love.
Ever-denying, control.
Flower Boy
He who smells of rain. Spells of an evergreen forest
A winter bloom. Race of uneven flesh
Powers of the collective of known. Upholder of belonging
Incantations. Holy verses bathed in pleasure
Pain of wanting, untarnished. Intensity of inescapability
Ungiving, forgiving, denying. Cobwebs of familiarity
Sweet, sweet smelling agony.
Stranger
Betrayer, son of the night.
Further than far.
Eyes of a cold faraway fire.
Perfect imperfection of hands.
Spine of fetal, feline recoil.
Conflict in the depth of silence.
Lover of the mirror.
Hands;Body;Mind;Heart-Soul?
Piece of Moon
Man of a whole universe.
Glib. Incorrect. Endearing.
Mind of the skies.
Home of his embrace.
Uncovered, blind faith.
Beautifully complete.
Sparkle
Formwave of love.
Ever-denying, control.
Powerful bursts of firework.
Inextricable unpredictability.
Listen: I will possess your heart; Death Cab for Cutie
Friday, August 12, 2011
Luck By Chance?
Relief, I know what it means to feel it in its full entirety. Do I feel anything fully? Now I do.
Third year: First class pass.
All I feel is relief, not happiness. It was never about doing well. To do well is to grow internally, to know you’ve achieved what you’ve wanted to. I do feel apathetic too. When an outcome has no true reflection of hard-work, talent or aptitude how can it be valid? In my bubble of security am I really better than the others? The answer is within me. You are as good as you believe. There can never be a justification in the cruel joke that they call the ‘result’.
For the first time in my architectural life have I thought of ‘The Fountainhead’ as an example; Peter Keating will always know in his heart who he is and how good an architect he is, no matter what the world says.
I look around with sheer disbelief.
Having said this, I am really glad to have gotten it over with; no third year to re-visit. But my empathy lies with those who deserved much more than they were destined for.
The Irreconcilable Trinity:
Deserved, Desired, Destined
If the three made peace, the world would be a better place. Or just teach me how to desire what I am destined for, not more and definitely not less.
Third year: First class pass.
All I feel is relief, not happiness. It was never about doing well. To do well is to grow internally, to know you’ve achieved what you’ve wanted to. I do feel apathetic too. When an outcome has no true reflection of hard-work, talent or aptitude how can it be valid? In my bubble of security am I really better than the others? The answer is within me. You are as good as you believe. There can never be a justification in the cruel joke that they call the ‘result’.
For the first time in my architectural life have I thought of ‘The Fountainhead’ as an example; Peter Keating will always know in his heart who he is and how good an architect he is, no matter what the world says.
I look around with sheer disbelief.
Having said this, I am really glad to have gotten it over with; no third year to re-visit. But my empathy lies with those who deserved much more than they were destined for.
The Irreconcilable Trinity:
Deserved, Desired, Destined
If the three made peace, the world would be a better place. Or just teach me how to desire what I am destined for, not more and definitely not less.
Wednesday, August 3, 2011
Wound
Battered, black and blue
Bruised, crimson and red
Recovered, purple and pink
Healed, yellow and beige
My temporary tattoo, 'sore' reminder of incidents never to be owned.
Read-ing: Last Man in Tower, Aravind Adiga
Listen-ing: Coke studios has some really beautiful mixes :)
Bruised, crimson and red
Recovered, purple and pink
Healed, yellow and beige
My temporary tattoo, 'sore' reminder of incidents never to be owned.
Read-ing: Last Man in Tower, Aravind Adiga
Listen-ing: Coke studios has some really beautiful mixes :)
Tuesday, July 12, 2011
Happy-shiny Raindrop faces
Happy, happy rain of your eyes
and the grey sparkled sky
Silent cold shiver of your spine
and goose-fleshed delight of mine
Bronzed wet matted hair of yours
With the smoke and sun in mine
Silver dreams behind your closed eyes
The best of my day-dreams
Splattering, ungraceful,tumultuous wind and rain
Mirror of our desires, unnamed
We wait for the rainbow today
wondering how far off will be, again?
Hot air-balloons in a moon glazed sky
Floating to a land called Away
Clouds float solemnly past me as though at a funeral. The tears have been shed, the window hides in her cloudy veil and the shroud of summer stretches endlessly above. We will mourn the death of summer's insolence a long long time.
PS:
Read: Curious incident of the dog in the nighttime.
Listen: Parachutes, Coldplay
Friday, June 17, 2011
Elec.tri.cal Storm
Mundanities:
The internship has provided a new perspective to architectural perception.
First week of school makes addressing the evolution of a hypothesis to take an ethical stand indispensible as we grow to become 'Architects'.
Rain brings with it paralyzing humidity. Listless mind, body, soul. Extensive site visits around Bombay ascertain its faceted personality, layered, stripped, coded, perpetually unearthed.
The holiday brought with it unbelievably beautiful moments.
Conflict lies safely within.
Read: From Bahaus to our house.
Midnight's Children.
Listen: Your rocky spine
-The great lake swimmers
PS:
You're in my mind all of the time
I know that's not enough
If the sky can crack there must be someway back
For love and only love
Electrical Storm
The internship has provided a new perspective to architectural perception.
First week of school makes addressing the evolution of a hypothesis to take an ethical stand indispensible as we grow to become 'Architects'.
Rain brings with it paralyzing humidity. Listless mind, body, soul. Extensive site visits around Bombay ascertain its faceted personality, layered, stripped, coded, perpetually unearthed.
The holiday brought with it unbelievably beautiful moments.
Conflict lies safely within.
Read: From Bahaus to our house.
Midnight's Children.
Listen: Your rocky spine
-The great lake swimmers
PS:
You're in my mind all of the time
I know that's not enough
If the sky can crack there must be someway back
For love and only love
Electrical Storm
Thursday, April 28, 2011
Musings
I
It is quite often that I find myself feeling like an after party floor, sticky and untreadable. At the end of every birthday party, like return gifts are a tradition, the floor, unfailingly will be sticky, like something that's gone bad of being over-used.
So the post-party sticky floor syndrome is to feel untreadable, umm unwanted probably but in a sticky sort of way. Like something that you don’t want but which will get stickier proportionately to the amount of not-wanting.
II
It’s probably weird to live as a piece of something else. Imagine being a broken piece of mirror. Its identity will always be associated with the whole although it is decisively broken and lives independently. Therefore it lives shadowed in the perception of the whole and identity remains associative, unestablished.
Pieces always feel the pain of the whole. Jagged edges are always virtues of broken parts, the greater puzzle of which the part is, will always ignore the blemish.
III
Living happens inside and outside your head. Life is lived in aspiration. To wait for things to become better. To want to be elsewhere, all the time. In another space, inside one's head. Sometimes in the need to be in another person's story space. To be relevant in alternate spaces. Today will always be lived as tomorrow’s past I read somewhere.
PS: Try looking at yourself in the reflection of a mirror, looking elsewhere and not into your own eyes, it’s like observing another person. I wonder how movie stars watch themselves as somebody else.
Conversely, if some looks into your eyes, you stop observing them. The equation definitively changes, to what, I can’t seem to articulate. Food for thought? Comments will be appreciated :)
It is quite often that I find myself feeling like an after party floor, sticky and untreadable. At the end of every birthday party, like return gifts are a tradition, the floor, unfailingly will be sticky, like something that's gone bad of being over-used.
So the post-party sticky floor syndrome is to feel untreadable, umm unwanted probably but in a sticky sort of way. Like something that you don’t want but which will get stickier proportionately to the amount of not-wanting.
II
It’s probably weird to live as a piece of something else. Imagine being a broken piece of mirror. Its identity will always be associated with the whole although it is decisively broken and lives independently. Therefore it lives shadowed in the perception of the whole and identity remains associative, unestablished.
Pieces always feel the pain of the whole. Jagged edges are always virtues of broken parts, the greater puzzle of which the part is, will always ignore the blemish.
III
Living happens inside and outside your head. Life is lived in aspiration. To wait for things to become better. To want to be elsewhere, all the time. In another space, inside one's head. Sometimes in the need to be in another person's story space. To be relevant in alternate spaces. Today will always be lived as tomorrow’s past I read somewhere.
PS: Try looking at yourself in the reflection of a mirror, looking elsewhere and not into your own eyes, it’s like observing another person. I wonder how movie stars watch themselves as somebody else.
Conversely, if some looks into your eyes, you stop observing them. The equation definitively changes, to what, I can’t seem to articulate. Food for thought? Comments will be appreciated :)
Saturday, January 1, 2011
New Year Wishlist?
Welcome 2011
The New Year as it seems will hopefully see some progress in the life of many.
I will clear third year architecture.
I will teach at Make A Difference again.
I will do something for mental and physical fitness!
I will give up non-vegetarian food for good.
I will not be scared of accepting how I feel.
I will blog more.
I will post what I write more.
I will think more, constructively.
I will learn music sincerely.
I.will.do
The New Year as it seems will hopefully see some progress in the life of many.
I will clear third year architecture.
I will teach at Make A Difference again.
I will do something for mental and physical fitness!
I will give up non-vegetarian food for good.
I will not be scared of accepting how I feel.
I will blog more.
I will post what I write more.
I will think more, constructively.
I will learn music sincerely.
I.will.do
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